A Man's Words

I was at a flat party tonight.  And I was supremely bored.  This depth of feeling has nothing whatever to do with the particular party or the people there.  It is my feeling at almost every party I have attended involving alcohol.

This party had no particular thing to celebrate other than getting people from work together in a non-work setting.  It had a loose Easter theme but the only concessions to this were a couple of pairs of bunny ears and a few egg shaped treats.

These things always start well, a small group of people interacting usually communally with intermittent one on one conversations.  Then as more arrive and more imbibing is done my experience has always been a tendency towards having very similar conversations to every conversation you’ve ever had with that person, or if you stumble upon someone you don’t know then it’ll be the same conversation you have had with someone else.

At some point as this happens I will stop drinking and start to notice the familiar moves of everyone present and fall out of the party into some void in my head.  Perhaps the fault lies with me in not engaging with the collective consciousness in the room.  But no matter how much effort I make to re-engage I get bored.  Then do ridiculous things (as further new conversation is a non-starter). 

Tonight that involved unfolding my cufflinked cuffs on my white shirt, climbing on the sofa and holding my arms aloft a la crucifixion.  Attention seeking?  Perhaps.  But even that brought no engagement with anyone, no communication forged between the wonderful minds that were certainly present at that party.  So I left feeling angry and alone amongst friends.

I’m sure the party is still in full swing and some there are still having a wonderful time.  But I seem the wrong build for the party situation.  And it troubles me.

It has happened again.  I saw a musical last night (“Pandemic” the Edinburgh Medics Musical at the Pleasance Theatre, still a few tickets left for the Saturday matinee I believe…) and my heart soared.  It’s ridiculous I suppose.  There are a few musicals I have hatred for; Cats has no story to engage with and insidious rather than catchy tunes, Grease I can’t deal with because of overexposure to the film due to my sister’s love of it.  But in general any production of any musical will make me want to be up there on stage. 

I used to react against it by pretending I hated them but that was mere jealousy.  I suppose it relates to my previous post about Doctor Who and the innocent joy it expresses and evokes in those who’ll go with it.  But there is something that speaks directly to me in the big number before the interval, the love duet, the expression of intent of the villain and any other number true to the tried and tested formula of musical theatre.

And I am going to write my own mini musical at some point in the very near future, probably involving my Victorian villain characters Ted and Unspeakable Henry.  I think this might be the project I mentioned in the Doctor Who post and so again the call goes out to anyone who wants to help.  Let’s make something joyful.

I know some who love me.

I know some who have loved me.

I know some who are required to love me but may well have anyway.

I know some who love some part of me.

I know some who love some imagined part of me.

To claim to know someone is folly.

To claim to love someone is fleeting.

I know no-one.

I love everyone.

I am part of a grand plan to create a 60 second version of the entirety of three seasons worth of Arrested Development.  All 53 episodes condensed into one minute of (we’re assuming) utter, unbridled hilarity.  This project is for no particular reason other than our love for quite possibly the best sitcom ever created.  And I’ve just watched it all again in approximately two weeks.

This task is a little ridiculous.  Certainly more ridiculous than condensing a two hour film to 60 seconds (which we have done successfully… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvuMhxvteCY).  Let’s get mathematical.  This task involves 53 twenty-two minute episodes i.e. 1166 minutes or 69,960 seconds of footage.  And we have 60 seconds.  We have to remove 69,900 seconds from Arrested Development and still make it funny.  Of course it is arguable that we could take any 60 seconds from the show and it would still be funny but our task is to represent all of it.  Why?

It is a show that I fell in love with from the first episode.  Thanks to a feature I’ve just discovered on Amazon I know I purchased it on 16 April 2005, the day before the season 2 finale in the US (thanks to Wikipedia for that information) so I was not an early adopter.  But I remember tears of laughter from episode 2 onwards (I imagine I had to reset my understanding of comedy during episode 1, hence the lack of tears).  My amusement was so vociferous that my girlfriend at the time (who did not enjoy it, maybe explaining in part the “at the time” suffix?) used to tell me off for disturbing her with my laughter while I listened to it on my portable DVD player.  This made me laugh more.

This is a show so utterly packed with comedy that I have now seen every episode at least four times, certain episodes more than that due to commentary action, and still find something new on every watch.  Tags on tags, music sting references to previous episodes, forward references to itself (TO ITSELF! WHO DOES THAT?! BRILLIANCE!) and sometimes just sheer silliness.  There is a clear joy from everyone involved and the blooper reels from every season highlight this.

I can’t choose a favourite character because it changes with every watch.  First time probably Gob.  Michael has been at the top for me too.  This time through I think I appreciated George and Oscar most (I’ve never realised how much they seem like two different people before, a true achievement from Jeffrey Tambor). 

I have to choose a character for me to portray.  I have Gob-danced as part of my stand up in the past, Michael is unlikely to have much competition from others wanting to play him (Gob and Tobias will be the most hotly contested I imagine) but I could wear a bald cap and a bald cap and wig for George and Oscar.  We’ll see.

We do also have to write the script and attempt to put in every throughline.  Maybe I’ll watch it all again and just write down all of the repeated lines, images and situations.  And still see something new. 

Bring on the movie I say.  Mitch Hurwitz and everyone who made this astonishingly good show, I salute you.

I am in love with a man.  And he doesn’t actually exist.

I just watched Doctor Who Series 5 opener The Eleventh Hour with commentary from Steven Moffat, Piers Wenger and Beth Willis.  I did this to have something familiar in the background while I folded a huge pile of clothes.  This does not mean that I’ve heard the commentary before, but I have seen the episode probably four times in total.  And I love The Doctor.

But not just this Doctor.  I mean, he’s a pretty great one beautifully moulded in the hands of both Steven Moffat and Matt Smith (and many other incredibly talented people).  My excitement levels for series 6 escalate daily.  But I love the idea of him.  The innocent joy of exploration.  Escape.  Fun.  Creating something.  All of these things I love apply to The Doctor as a character and to those who make the television programme Doctor Who.  I want to be one of those people.  I want to create things that inspire joy and fun and fear.  I want to be responsible in some way for a creative work that has the chance, but not the stated intention, to unsettle beliefs or views by nudging you in just the right way.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I80pc9jZ_t8

That piece of music, the eleventh Doctor’s theme, speaks deeply to me.  You can see the hero, accidental and unwitting as he might be, running headlong through a life of wonder and magic.  I want to capture that life by being part of some creative team.  Working on Doctor Who in any way would be an incredible opportunity, but it needn’t be that particularly.  It can be anything.  It can be a project written and filmed with no budget, all it requires is that communication of the joys inherent in life.  Pure, innocent and heartfelt fun. 

Who wants to join in?

I have stopped for two days.  I have been in my flat and not gone outside.  I have watched three films (Zombieland, The Lost Boys and Control - anarchic fun, silly fun and very little fun but rather devastating respectively), watched a few episodes of TV shows, slept, cooked, put clothes on to wash, emptied the dishwasher and been still. This stillness was enforced by a stinking head cold, but is very much appreciated all the same.

Normally illness makes me frustrated and grumpy, but I can appreciate the positives of this particular conglomeration of mucus and pain.  It is by no means the worst cold I’ve ever had but was enough to ensure I couldn’t give tours or even face the outside world.  I needed to stop for a bit and now I have. 

My current plan is to have a bath then move onto more films.  If the mood takes me later I might try some editing for the Medics Musical trailer or write some new stand up but I feel no pressure to do either because I am recovering.

Thank you ‘not too serious illness’ (Notsi for short?) for your apt timing and for being an excuse to pause.